My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell

“Vanessa,” she says gently, “you didn’t ask for that. You were just trying to go to school.”

This is a book that I usually would not pick up. My reading is about escapism, not real-world familiarity. I am all about self-preservation, but this book felt necessary in today’s world, where these dangerous relationships seem much easier.

My Dark Vanessa explores the dynamics between a teenage girl and her manipulative teacher. It is told in two alternating timelines.

In the year 2000, when Vanessa Wye was fifteen years old, and at a close-to-home boarding school she begged to go to, she fell for her teacher Jacob Strane, her forty-two-year-old English teacher. It is clear how he has access to her. It is clear he understands what he is doing is wrong. It is clear she doesn’t.

In the year 2017, Jacob Strane was accused of sexual abuse by a former student, who reached out to Vanessa. This gives Vanessa the choice. Speak out and redefine the events of her past and herself, or stay silent and firm in believing she was in a willing relationship with her teacher.

But Vanessa’s life is still entangled with that of her abusers. Sometimes, actually, more often than not, it’s easier to accept the abuse as a part of life than to become the victim.

This book is heartbreaking and shows the strengths and weaknesses of teenage girls and women thrust into their past.